Thursday, June 25, 2009
Wierd and wonderful
Last night I had butterflies in my stomach. Nervous excitement mixed with some worry- I couldn't keep it from bubbling up. You see, something scary and totally wonderful is about to happen to me. In about an hour I am going to walk out of the church building and be on sabbatical. This is weird and wonderful.
Why weird you ask? Well, because what in the world am I going to do for three months? I mean I have a number of plans- in fact, too many. I'll probably learn from this sabbatical not to over program the next one- but that's what I do- I program, I'm good at it. Weird because I'm not going to walk in the door to First Christian Church, Livingston for three months (or at least not on a regular basis). Wierd because I am a minister. That's not all I am- but its a HUGE part of who I am. It's not that I will cease to be one for three months, but just that will not be my primary role. What is my primary role? Child of God I would say. My job is to remember who I am and whose I am and to come back more connected with my source of life when I return.
Why wonderful you ask? Because I get to play for three months. I get to visit friends and family that have missed seeing me and whom I have missed while I have served these last five years. I get to reconnect with my husband, I get to read a stack of books I have been meaning to get to. I get to think, and write, and pray, and worship in other people's churches. Most of all I get to just hang out with God. What a precious gift. Thank you in advance to my church.
But right now, this hour- my emotions are mixed. My office is too clean. It doesn't look lived in. I've been cleaning it all week so as to de-clutter a bit in preparation for being gone. And there are still those butterflies... they tell me this is important stuff I'm about to embark on.
One of my church members referred to a beloved Thom Schuyler song we sing at Graduation celebrations around here called, "Take a Little With You When You Go," and that's what I plan to do. The song says,
"Pack your Bible in your suitcase.
Jesus loves you this I know.
Break the bread and fill the cup,
we're never gonna use it up-
so take a little with you when you go."